hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Randomize