we're blogging at a bar
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
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