i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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