We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I bet he comes in French.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
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