Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Randomize