Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Pants are for mortals
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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