Whod you bang
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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