Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
i drank out of a bidet.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
