No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
