TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Randomize
