"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
