is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
