Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
