You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
