I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
