I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize