Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
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