Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
