Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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