toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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