awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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