all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
