no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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