He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Randomize
