Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
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