so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
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