so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Come share oat with me in your robe
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
