She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
