didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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