Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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