belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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