Heybabeimwearingurpanties
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
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