There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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