Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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