ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
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