I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
