just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
