I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
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