oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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