he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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