i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
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