Her vagina should come with caution tape.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
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