I don't think brook has ever known best
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
