what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
