she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Randomize
