You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize
