I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Is that strawberry winking at me??
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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