I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
