I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
