Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
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