"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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